How to Date Your Husband After Children
My husband and I recently went on a date and as we were enjoying this beautiful evening it suddenly dawned on me that the last time we had a date was our anniversary, 18 months before this date! I was so ashamed that we had let ourselves get so caught up in life and excuses that dating each other got put behind everything else in life. I have since come up with some tips to date your husband after children.
Dating Is So Important
When you two first started hanging out with each other, you probably put a lot of time into each other. You made sure that your hair and makeup were perfect. You liked to look your best every time you saw your special someone. Always planning the best dates with each other became a priority over everything else in your life.
Jump ahead a few years and you two are now married with a child or more at home. Suddenly dating has been pushed to the back burner for more important matters. Your children are young and up half the night. Nursing has become all you seem to be good for. The to-do list at home is literally NEVER ending because let’s be honest, everything we clean seems to miraculously be dirty again five minutes later.
You’re failing to realize in the middle of this chaotic season that you are nourishing most of the relationships and things in your life. Yet, the most important human relationship you have is slowly withering. God is always first, but your spouse is second. He is not behind your children, your household chores, work, or to-do lists.
Dating is SO important in nourishing this relationship. Humans are constantly changing and in order for you to make sure you always know your husband well, you have to make the effort to continuously get to know him all over again. Time alone is needed in order to accomplish this.
Stop Making Excuses
I have been there, making excuses about why we cannot go on a date. We don’t have a sitter, our children are such a handful I don’t want to burden someone else with them. Maybe the to-do list didn’t get done and date night is not possible or the to-do list was so long today that you’re just plain out tired.
The first step to dating your husband and rebuilding the passionate connection you originally had together is to STOP with the excuses. A simple way to accomplish this is to pick a day that both of you are off and write it down in the calendar, “DATE NIGHT.”
As soon as it is marked down ask your sitter if that day works for them as well. If you don’t have a sitter then I am sure you have a fellow mommy who could use some time with her own hubby. Swap date nights once a month. She can watch your children and then you will watch hers. That not only saves money, but it gives your children a nice playdate.
Right when you mark that down though, you have to arrange the childcare. That will take the “no sitter excuse” out of the equation. And since it will be on the calendar, unless an emergency arises, there is no reason you should be too busy that day to hang out.
12 Months Of Dates
After my date night realization a couple of months ago I decided to come up with a different date for each month of the year. I already went through my calendar and made a note on the dates my husband and I are available. In doing so, I have no excuse to skip that month’s date night. You can sit down with your husband and fill in your own 12 Months of Dates. You both will look forward to all the fun things you’re going to do throughout the year!
Planning something different each month keeps things exciting. Honestly if I did not pre-plan these things, my husband and I would likely be simply going to dinner for each date night. Again in the beginning of a relationship you go all out for dates. That shouldn’t stop after children.
Plus, doing something different each month helps to create memories for your husband and you that are new and exciting. It puts a little bit of fun back into your lives together. Having fun together reignites the happiness and love you have for one another. It is a win-win all around!
I hope that you have been inspired to recreate the romance your marriage once had. Also, to make sure you are always making time to nourish your marital relationship. Don’t forget to print your own 12 Months of Date to fill in with your spouse (which is awesome in itself, since you both will be looking forward to the fun dates you have planned)!
12 Month Date Nights
Plan 12 Months of date nights with your hubby and start looking forward to the fun you both will have together each month!